Would you like to write your own obituary/eulogy where you choose the last words left for your loved ones after you pass? As a writer with over 20 years experience I can help with this task. Please get in touch via milnerwriting@gmail.com (monitored throughout the day with notifications enabled) or via cell/text using 506 639 3738.
Here is a eulogy I penned for a client:
Adieu
By: Katherine Watson
If my beloved granddaughter, Grace, is reading this memoir aloud
then I have seen my last tomorrow. This is my final journal entry, my own
eulogy, saving everyone the anxiety of figuring out what to say now that I have
passed on to whatever comes next.
My promise to every one of you, given at different times – I
could not vow that I would be here for the rest of your life, but I pledged to
be here for the rest of mine.
I knew five months ago that the diagnosis of Glioblastoma
would ensure that I would not live to comb my grey hair. Please understand that
I did not share this with you earlier as I wanted the time I had left to be
normal and without my loved ones starting to grieve before my time here was
over. Before my symptoms became most troubling, I did give you time to say your
last words before I slipped into a coma then gently drifted away.
Instead of plying you with memories of our time together, I
will share only a couple where we were all together and decidedly not at a
funeral or wedding. Words of wisdom and advice that were present throughout my
life here is a better way, I think, to say my farewell.
It was July 22nd, 2015 and we were all enjoying
our family reunion. Planning that special weekend was made all the more sweet
because everyone who wanted to be there were able to attend. Those five days
filled with BBQs, playing washers and horseshoes along with the entertainment
of you all belting out your favorite tunes via karaoke made memories, well documented
with photos and videos, that will last all of you a lifetime.
On September 1st, 2019, we were able to pull off
another reunion where our family and friends spent a magical 10 days at Disney
World. We put on a lot of miles park-hopping, enjoying shows and rides inside
air-conditioned buildings, and were even able to score two nights where all of
us could eat together. It has warmed my heart to look at all of the photos
taken by Disney photographers. They truly documented our Disney adventures so
we didn’t have to see one another from behind a camera lens. I am sure you all
remember and smile, or even giggle, when you think about the epic water blaster
competition that took us in and out of the resort. It was awesome that the
staff left everyone one of their own to soak their opponents.
Over my years as a resident on this planet, I have learned a
lot about our species when it comes to being a happy and productive citizen. As
well, I have taken advice, given in kind, that has made life easier and more
enjoyable. Here, I give you bits that I have used that made me a better person
in addition to helping me become acclimatized to this often challenging time we
have here on earth.
When
you are pregnant, don’t find out if it will be a boy or a girl. There are few
surprises that are truly fun so take advantage of this one. You know it is
going to be a boy or a girl so wait until the moment of their birth to find
out. It makes the birth exponentially more exciting! Sure you can have a much
anticipated ‘reveal’ party, but make the balloons and cake yellow and tell
everyone they will find out whether it is a boy or a girl when you give birth.
Please
do not practice what John Steinbeck described as ‘inactive kindness’. When you
tell someone you will be there if they need you or that you will visit more
often, make good on those commitments. Many times, people already have an
excuse ready, in regards to why they can’t help, before they are even called on for their assistance. Consider
your priorities carefully and reorder them if needed. Being there when someone
calls on you trumps the errands you were planning to do that day or the two
hours you were going to spend reading.
Always
engage your brain before you speak – in any situation. You can apologize for
saying words, but they can never be unsaid. Also, note that the phrase ‘forgive
and forget’ is inaccurate. You can always forgive someone but you can’t forget
what they did.
Be
careful of what makes its’ way into your brain. You cannot ‘unsee’ an atrocity
shown in an online video nor can you ‘unhear’ a blood-curdling scream in an
intense horror movie.
Give
your loved ones ‘unconditional love’ and guard their secrets. Everyone needs
someone in their life that they can trust that will not turn their confidences
into gossip. Be that person.
I
will conclude with a bible verse, poem and, song that you can use to help you
through your grief – yes THROUGH your grief. There is no way around allowing
yourself to grieve. You cannot outrun it as it will be nipping at your ankles
no matter how fast you run away. Let yourself heal both mentally and physically
as grief can drain you of energy and rob you of sleep. Look forward, not back,
and keep putting one foot in front of the other.
My
faith is strong and I am there, just beyond the veil – nudging you forward when
life gets tough, perched on your shoulder and stroking your cheek when tears
flow, and being your best cheerleader from the other side.
Until
we meet again…
From
the Bible, Corinthians 13:13 – And now these three remain: faith hope, and
love. But the greatest of these is love.
A
beautifully written poem by Mary Lee Hall:
Turn
Again to Life
If I should die and leave you here a while
be not like others – sore, undone – who keep
long vigils by the silent dust and weep.
For my sake – turn again to life and smile,
Nerving thy heart and trembling hand to do
something to comfort weaker hearts than thine.
Complete these dear unfinished tasks of mine
and I, perchance, may therein comfort you.
A
song to get you through those hard times:
Be Not Afraid
John Michael Talbot
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wQr4udSiEew
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